Do you like me??...Do you love me??.. I have been praying for us... have you been praying for us??.. I have so many doubts in my mind right now...
I know what i feel for you... but i don't know if we should go on or just be friends... this is being a hard time for me... i really miss you... i already know all that talk about "we will have other opportunities to be together"... but will we??...

This can't be floating in air ... I can't stay with questions forever... I need answers too...
This past few days i have been trying not to think about you... but let me tell you one thing... it's impossible.. every time i close my eyes... you appear...your eyes and the way you look at me... your smile and the way you make me smile too... your lips and the way you engage me in your conversation... your kindness... your love for GOD and doing His work... I might be crazy girl ...and be dreaming to much...!!... i honestly don't want to get myself hurt... i dont want to give myself for something that it's not going to work... i will keep praying because i want GOD's will in GOD's time.. but i really needed to tell you this... i feel that that is something wrong... i just don't know what it is.... can you tell me??...

GOD I love you and I am needing your guidence...

My Birthday...!!

Thank you GOD for one more year of life... I couldn't do it without YOU... You're the reason I live ...and I couldn't be more happy...  :D
Thanks for making me what I am today... for all the oportunities given to me... every person in my life... for being there every time I need...
LORD thanks for helping me trough all the sad and painfull moments and for the happy ones too.... You are so amazing that I can't even express myself...
You are my life... You are my all.. The best...
I LOVE YOU GOD ABOVE ANYTHING THAT EXISTS.... just help to keep in your way... and guide me trough the darkness... I want to do everything for you... I want to show people that you are worth it... and that with you all things are possible... build me as you want... ;)
THANK YOU JESUS CRIST... <3

Can we blame it on the raing??

It didn't even bothered me.... I was suprised with myself.... when did I stopped caring??.... when did I stopped having those feelings??.... did it just disappear??... did it vanished away??.... right now i can't tell but I'm happy this way....
So many silence joined with a long distance... I used to keep forgetting to forget about you.... the memories would come up in a blink of an eye... I remembered the way we laugh... the way we talked... the way we would look to each other... in a time when I thought that I would never ever miss those things and I end up missing it....in a time where we used to glow.... in a time that those things... you... were so important even when I was trying to make you less important...
Can we blame it on the rain??... I guess not.... but it was definitely something wonderful... something unforgettable... something crazy... something good...
The good part is that I recovered my breath... the one YOU took from me...
I won't forget but right now I won't miss it... I won't miss you that way...
We could look back and try to change somethings so it could work... but "we were meant to fall in love but not to be together" ...wasn't God's will... now I could look to the present and ask... "does she look at you the same way I once did?".... "does she feel the same rush that I once felt when you're around?"... "does she understand...??"... questions that I don't care about the answers anymore...
You're tangled and I am free... whose better??...
I might be somehow alone in this... but I will always find peace ... I will always find company... I will always find refuge in the ONE that will never leave behind or alone.... in GOD!!

Em Português.... ?!?!?

Sei que estás MUITO feliz, mas só quero dizer que ainda anseio por ti, pela tua felicidade!
AMOT-TE... palavra com diversos significados... diversos sentidos... desculpa, mas tinha de o dizer...
Não sei se há espaço no teu coração para mim, no entanto no meu nunca ninguém irá ocupar aquele lugar que um dia foi TEU...
Por mais que eu procure... que tente dar a volta ao mundo... tenho a certeza que não há ninguém como tu... ninguém com o teu toque... ninguém com o teu nível de interesse...
Ainda não consegui entender porque é que voltaste para mim... se sabias que não podias ficar?!?!...
Espero que todo o sentimento tenha valido apena... toda a espera... toda a angústia... toda a dor... que calada guardo no meu peito...
Enquanto isso fico extremamente feliz... com um sorriso de "orelha a orelha"... com o coração a bater mais forte que nunca... e tudo isso apenas por saber que ainda partilhas comigo a tua amizade... a tua honestidade... a tua sinceridade... a tua cúmplicidade... as tuas brincadeiras...
Desejo que continues feliz como se que te estão a fazer... que eu ficarei aqui... num silêncio cortante de cada pensamento... de cada palavra que eu escrevo... sempre à espera de mais uma conversa...

Never thought that I would write a text in portuguese and post it.... never thought that i would be able to express myself trough portuguese words... ;D

God is the only LORD and only KING of my life... I'm glad that I depend on Him... because I know He takes care of me... good care... ;D

I Admit...for Bad or for Good

I thought that I didn't care.... that I could leave it behind...
We all have strange conversations with our friends.... and I always said that by seeing other points of views anyone could change their minds and their opinions... I just didn't realized that I could change my opinion too...
Everything happens for a reason right?!?... but I never understand it.... GOD help me to see...


After rewind some conversations I realized and I admit...
-that when I talk to you... it's not 100% like I thought it was...
-that when I see you... I keep trying to look for more...
-that when I think about you... I try not to do it... to avoid a numerous things...
-that when I somehow listen to your voice... I think that you won't be easy to forget... like I thought I did when I said.... I had...

The truth... for bad your for good is that I still feel the same old way...I didn't thought I still did... I feel just like I felt at the begining... If you were wonderind...

Rethinking sometimes is a good thing other times is a bad thing because it leads us to do some stuff that we probably will regret or not... but this time I'm not sure which one to pick... good or bad..??!!??

It's your fault that I have been thinking about it... you probably should've choose to agrre with me... now I'm like this... sayng and writing nonsense things...

GOD help me to be in your way... not going for short cuts or easy ways... I want your way... you love in my life... do it by your will.... ;D

YOUR LIPS...

Sometimes when we are frustated we say things we dont mean to.... and then we end up regreting each of the words prenounced by our lips... words without any meaning inside ...
It wasnt intirelly my fault... i was counting on you somehow and you let myself down...couldn't be indifferent ... if we ever decided to be friends i was not the only one to allow it ... it was so fast ... so sudden ...it was unbearable ... couldn't stand without saying anything ...
I'm relivied that i let it all out... I do still want you back... because above all... you are an amazing friend... and an amazing person... that cares about people...
I wish that some moments could last forever...
The last things that i've been praying for... is your lips whispering my name... just to say a simple and warm "hello" ...just to me... to anyone else...

Good now...

I'm glad that we are good now...
It was difficult for me to admit it... sometimes only we have to do is to let ourselfs out... and talk with our fellings... something that i'm not used to... 'cause later or soon i know that it might come against me and hurt me... so i guess i prefer playing safe... and sometimes that's not always the best thing to do...
I'm happy to know that you do missed it too...to know that you didn't understand "why?" as much as i didn't... all i needed to know was what you thought about all this little... but at the same time... big thing... i liked to hear that you "don't know why you stopped..."... cause like you said you stopped not me
Even if its hard to me to say... i was crushed... i was sad... and then i tried to be ok with it but until today that was impossible... but still i always managed to said that "i'm fine"...
I dont want to be like that ever again...
I will keep on praying... GOD knows what He want.... so i live it up to Him...